Coffee with America

3427335111_1e89d67347_b
Photo by dearbarbz365 (CC BY-NC 2.0)

Virtual “coffee dates” have been a way for bloggers to create a sense of conversational intimacy with their readers. But because my characters are way more interesting than I am, I’ll let them handle this. Today, discover the latest happenings in America’s life (i.e., US foreign policy) during this special one-on-one with the United States. Lucky you!


America isn’t drinking coffee. He’s drinking a large caramel frappuccino. Loudly.

“Man, I just don’t know,” he says earnestly. “I kind of get where he’s coming from with the wall, but, like… do I really wanna be known as the guy with a huge wall between him and his neighbor? That sounds like some straight up Soviet bullshit. And let me be clear—Soviet bullshit is not what I strive for in life.'”

He slurps more.

The drink is gone, America. You’re not going to get any more out. Just stop.

Continue reading “Coffee with America”