Trump-Kim Summit: The Aftermath

North Korea and China chat about the summit. Meanwhile, America celebrates a win.

North Korea and China chat about the summit. Meanwhile, America celebrates a win.


Opening the door to the office unleashed a herbaceous assault on North Korea’s senses.

“What’s that smell?” he said loudly as soon as he stepped in.

China was half asleep at his desk. He jerked awake, blinked a couple of times, then said, “My oils.”

“Your oils.”

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5 Times America Was in Love

America remembers five of his past romantic relationships and how he completely ruined them.

Being stuck in bed with a dangerously high fever and no strength to do anything but stare at the TV had repercussions, particularly when you end up watching Hallmark and prime time television for three days straight.

That night, the mix of delirium from the sickness combined with 72 hours worth of romcom reruns and soap operas had America in a very particular mood: reminiscing about past relationships.

You should be warned:

The sick mind likes to embellish.

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Gangsters and Rebels

This is a story of fervor and pain,
of two lovers in political chains.

Have you ever found yourself in a terrible situation because of love? Mexico has. With his last breath drawing near, body wracked with pain as he lay dying in a pool of his own blood, he tries to remember the stupid decisions that lead up to this point so he can regret them one last time.


PROLOGUE

The Cold War divided the world harshly,
Ambitious superpowers came to rise,
Two blocs, two kings, two ideologies,
seeking total dominance as their prize.
The United States had an obsession:
full control of the Western Hemisphere,
While the USSR sought possession
of Eastern Europe and everyone near.
Many were caught in this raging feud,
Some of them were willing, fueled by rancor,
while others were victims of turpitude,
manipulated, used in proxy wars.
This is a story of fervor and pain,
of two lovers in political chains.

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Brotherly Love is a Death Threat

South Korea’s family problems are probably worse than yours.

Two mini stories about South Korea because she deserves the love.


South Korea was on her back and clutching a throw pillow to her chest. She watched the ceiling fan whirl and stir up the summer air. Then her face twisted in pain.

“I don’t know what to do,” she said. “I can’t call him North anymore because he hates it. But I can’t call him Korea either because I’m Korea too.” Her brow scrunched up. “And like hell I’m going to call him ‘DPRK.’ It’s too long.”

On the other side of the couch, America was abusing a controller; like a real gamer, he knew that mashing buttons would make his attacks work better.

He said, “Why don’t you just call him, like, Diparky?”

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Upcoming Book: Manifest Destiny! Smokin’ Guns! And One F*cked Up War!

Am I actually writing a western? Yup.

One cowboy. One fighter. One victim. One survivor.

This is the story of a callous hero with a calling from God, of the man standing in his way, of a declining empire struggling to confront addiction, humiliation, and weakness, of a woman coming to grips with a violent and uncertain future.

This is the Mexican-American War, told through a shoot-em-up western rich with moral ambiguity and anti-imperialism vitriol, and absolutely free of poorly-written Southern accents.

And so, the long and arduous journey beings. I’m excited to share this new adventure with you guys; many of you have written or are writing a book, so I know I’m in good company. Pray for me, ya’ll! But also definitely share your novel-writing tips and struggles.

Want a little teaser of the novel? Check it out below.

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The Five Countries You Meet in Hell

Mama, we’re meant for the flies.

His boots kicked up dirt as he shuffled through the ridge, musket slung over his shoulder. The large boulders that lined the narrow passage on both sides were cool even when the air was thick and hot. Cannons blasted in the distance and with each crack, his heart beat faster.

It was 1865.

Wait. No, it wasn’t.

America froze in his tracks because he remembered.

He remembered dying.

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