The MAGA Chronicles: Globalism is for Cucks

The MAGA Chronicles is a new series that takes you on a journey with Trump’s America, where narcissism and depravity know no bounds.


I never wanted to hurt my sister, but the monster must die.

My hurried footsteps echo against the walls of the bare corridor in time with my heartbeat. Lights flicker overhead. An alarm wails in the distance, but I’m not afraid of what’s coming. Having made love to many, many beautiful countries just before arriving here, all at once, I’m invigorated–and out for blood.

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Gangsters and Rebels

This is a story of fervor and pain,
of two lovers in political chains.

Have you ever found yourself in a terrible situation because of love? Mexico has. With his last breath drawing near, body wracked with pain as he lay dying in a pool of his own blood, he tries to remember the stupid decisions that lead up to this point so he can regret them one last time.

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The MAGA Chronicles

The world according to Trump’s America

 

You think North Korea is the only one who gets to tell his story? I’ve read it. It’s absolutely pathetic. I mean, I couldn’t tell if it was supposed to be a work of fiction or a New York Times article. Oh, wait, they’re the same thing. And the worst part–let me tell you–is that he makes me looks so bad. #FakeHistory. But I’m a great guy–you know that I’m a great guy.  So I’ve decided to set the record straight. You’ll see. You’ll all see.

They say that history is written by the victors, and guess what? I never lose.

“The MAGA Chronicles”
Coming this October

(While you’re waiting, go ahead and read about how America unlocked his final form upon discovering that he’s a hyperpower.)

American Doctrines 101

Six American doctrines, six morally questionable decisions.

Here at P&P, I value education. It’s why I always strive to explain history and politics in the simplest and most unprofessional ways possible, to make the information easier to digest. Today, I want to look at six US foreign policy doctrines–why they were written, and what they set out to accomplish. Although there’s a cheat sheet above, read on for a better understanding.

And if you want to test your knowledge at the end, I made a quiz that will put your high school history teachers to shame.

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The Day Russia Saved the World

Russia throws a wrench in the American war machine.

Russia drank coffee in the garden, big, round sunglasses on and a cigarette hanging between her fingers.  After a while, she let out a long exhale of smoke.

“Prague, 2010. The world was on the cusp of the Arab Spring. There was an electricity in the air–you could feel it.”

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The Anti-America Game

A blazing red Bel Air convertible barreled down the street, roof pulled all the way back and engine roaring. On the car’s bumper, a sticker that read CAPITALISM KILLS.

Want to talk about anti-Americanism, Cuba, or anything else related to this post? Be sure to check out the Discussion at the end of the story and share your thoughts.


A blazing red Bel Air convertible barreled down the street, roof pulled all the way back and engine roaring. Little flags on each side of the hood danced wildly in the rushing air. On the car’s bumper, a sticker that read CAPITALISM KILLS.

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There’s a Lot of Bad Blood in This Strait

“He’ll choke you until you submit.”

Recently, the United States announced it would deliver an arms package to Taiwan. Simple, right? Not really;  there are layers, and we all know how dangerous those can be.


America leaned back against the polished wooden chair and drummed his fingers against his knees. “This is weird. We’ve never done this before, have we?”

“Why would we? You only hold secret meetings with other countries, isn’t that right?” Taiwan’s voice was like coffee with just cream; you didn’t realize that it was bitter until you thought about it enough.

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